woensdag, december 24, 2003

Finally! America Confesses!

U.S. Discovers Its First Suspected Case of Mad Cow Disease

A sick cow slaughtered about two weeks ago near Yakima, Wash., has tested positive for mad cow disease in early laboratory results, the first such case in the United States, the secretary of agriculture said on Tuesday.

Hang on, sorry. I thought they meant Mad President Jesus Pig Disease. Not this time around I'm afraid. Hohoho. Have a very Scary Christmas as you listen to President Jesus Bush perform The Night Before Christmas clearly on some form of Hillbilly Heroin.


O'course when he isn't misreading xmas poems for little kiddies, President Bush has been very busy with the celebration of Hanukkah 2003:

"I've asked the photographers here this evening because I'm told you all are smack dab in the middle of Hanukkah, which officials in the White House Department of Faith tell me is just a fancy Hebrewish word for "Celebrate the Murder of Christ." No matter – the Constitution still grants you folks the right to practice your peculiar faith here in America. And I'm bound to respect that, even though it strikes me as a bit odd that I am up here lighting this Mendora thing, when Christians are not yet free to ignite crosses in Israel. But that day will come. Oh yes, indeed!"


Speaking of which:

Israël: des soldats d'élite refusent de servir dans les territoires

"Nous ne donnerons plus nos vies pour l'oppression dans les territoires et la négation des droits de l'homme de millions de Palestiniens, et nous ne servirons plus de boucliers aux implantations" juives dans ces territoires, ont-ils ajouté dans une lettre. "Nous ne corromprons pas plus longtemps l'humanité que nous avons en nous en menant les missions d'une armée d'occupation (...). Autrefois, nous avons combattu pour une cause juste (mais aujourd'hui), nous avons dépassé la limite de l'oppression d'un autre peuple", précisent les réservistes, expliquant qu'ils "ne franchiront plus cette limite... " Bravo. via Je Blog


If you weren't convinced yet that the terrorists are coming to America for some more fun and destruction, the fact that this was allowed to happen just shows you how vulnerable we all are:

"An explosion rocked a dairy Tuesday, blowing the roof off the center section of the plant, starting a fire and injuring two people."

Need we say more?

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