woensdag, juli 28, 2004

Overcast In England

Because these are necessarily slow times; days without sun tend to make life seem slower, painstakingly drawn out, because of this and because the Democratic Convention is going on in America and no news is good news, I've decided it must be time to refrain from political rants and so, here is a poem from someone born in Rochester, NY:

It Must Be Sophisticated
John Ashbery

There are attics in old houses
where doubt lingers as to the corrosive
effect of night-blindness: namely
are its victims directly linkable to a chain
of events happening elsewhere? If so,
we should shrug off resemblances

to our line of work. What was said around
the house had undue influence on one of several
shapely witnesses. And, as dames do,
she started talking to any and every
interlocutor out of harm's way. One day
you wake up and they've skipped. Or was it

always empty like this? It's hard
to remember a time when it wasn't. Maybe
your memory's playing tricks on you? Maybe
there never was such a person as Lisa Martins?
Maybe it's all over when you stand up
to walk the last mile in Enna Jettick shoes,

and they draw the blind quickly to forget you.
Once forgotten you're as good as dead,
anyway. And who would help you now?
You might as well be trapped at the bottom of a well
in the Sahara. They don't know you're alive,
or that your life was anything but exemplary

when it came time for you to live.
The fashionable present keeps queening it
over the slightly dishonorable past. Your
bridesmaids are scattered on the wind.
You don't feel like having lunch. Maybe
a walk, and a cup of tea later?

We'll see you at the end of the month!
they cried. Now it keeps ticking,
there must be a mystery down there,
darn it. I'll find it if it takes all night
and then some other sleuth can solve it.
I was only hired as a go-between. My tour is ended,

and if I've a piece of advice for you, it's
check out the rafters, the moldings.
You can't tell who might have bargained
for clemency in your absence, leaving you holding
the bag when you got back, restless,
ready to start school, but the vagrant air's black,

what with the negative promise of spring.
The boys are still rehearsing their parts
they haven't been over, and really
it's none of my business. Said the table to the chair.
I was confined here. That's all I know,
truthfully. During the amnesty I walked

out through the open gate. The streets were full of people,
running back and forth, talking disjointedly. I was
supposed to be somewhere else, but no one knew it.
In the confusion I returned home.
Now the newshounds pester us daily.
What was I born for? More experiments?

Why are they fighting over a fuse? It doesn't
seem to be harmless like those people are listening to over there;
at the same time, everyone's a suspect in the new
climate and country. The wind turns a page
of the old tome, then another and another; soon
it's riffling through them too fast to stop.

There's nothing in it anyway. Time to move on
to another frontier beyond the transparent frieze
of foliage, guns, barges, to where he began.
Sure, dem days is gone forever, but it's the attention span
that's really gone. Back when they'd send for you
once they got a house built, it was clever

to hedge your bets and produce a fraternal twin
made of bedclothes with a mop for a wig
while you scaled the wall on a rope ladder
to be the next new thing that thinks
and cautions others not to. Far from the
inner city cry of conflicting attitudes, one fled with one's

holy illusions intact, one's misconceptions too, until the whole
mindset took on a largely symbolic
look, an indifferent jewel, toy
of the weather, of successive washes of light,
I can hardly believe I'm here
in this tiny republic carved out of several conflicting

principalities. It's enough, perhaps, that I was questioned
at the edge of my performance. That now I'm safe
from my own sang-froid and scores of others,
that mere forgetfulness can save up to fifty-three lives,
that they can share your power and go on glancing
upward. Because after all we were the three

original ones, the president, vice-president and treasurer
of our class. And were formed to repay
what obscure debt and be summarily
taken out of school and handed over to our parents.
It's what matters then, and after. No one
says you have to live up to principles; indeed, what are they?

What difference does it make which one came too close
in the richly darkened theater, if all
they were after was to coax you into the light,
watch you blink a minute, and then pass on, they too,
to the larger arenas, each in the wind,
in the sand, the reeds, growing? Because even if it doesn't

punish you exactly, the thing has been
lived through, the experience sealed.
O what book shall I read
now? for they are all of them new, and used,
when I write my name on the flyleaf. Look,
here is another one unread, not written. Time for you to choose.

nicked from CONJUNCTIONS:19 Fall 1992

Conjunctions

vrijdag, juli 23, 2004

Spreading Generalised, Promiscuous Anxiety FaLaLaLaLa

As if we weren't busy enough already, it appears the business of fear-mongering is alive and well:

"Ashcroft's performance confirmed the suspicion held by many that the Bush administration is in the cynical business of spreading generalised, promiscuous anxiety through the American populace, a sense of imminent but inexact catastrophe, for reasons that may have little to do with national security and much to do with
political advantage. In the past three years, in the name of homeland security, a vast, coast-to-coast, combined surveillance and people-scaring apparatus has been assembled, on a scale, and with an intimate reach, never before seen in a democracy. The administration appears to be still learning to play this marvellous instrument, and wrong notes, such as those struck by Ashcroft, are common. But practice makes perfect."


excerpt from the Guardian's Running Scared

For those who aren't scared, thar's plenty o money in them thar hills of death and killing! (especially for specialists like, Veep Dick "Go Fuck Yourself" Cheney,:

"Meanwhile, Cheney was busy developing Halliburton's business in other parts of the world. "It is a false dichotomy that we have to choose between our commercial and other interests," he told the [public policy research foundation] Cato Institute in 1998, speaking out against economic sanctions levied by the Clinton administration against countries suspected of terrorist activity. "Our government has become sanctions-happy," he continued."

Profits of War

*****

For those of you who needed millions of dollars of bureaucratic waste, the 9/11 report is finally out and guess what?!

Much like the Butler Report detailing the failure of governments, the equally useless 9/11 Panel magically found No one is really to blame!

Whew. That was a close one.

Now you can go back to your regularly scheduled programming until the next politically expedient terrorist attack or threat thereof will snap you awake with the force of a whiplash car crash.

dinsdag, juli 20, 2004

Blair: War 'an act of love-sick temporary insanity'

LONDON, England -- British Prime Minister Tony Blair has defended his decision to go to war against Iraq, hinting that while intelligence at the time left "little doubt" about Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction if you were a war-mongering delusionalist President Bush lapdog, there was the "slight possiblity" that he was temporarily insane during the decisions leading up to the war.

"Removing Saddam was not a war crime, although slaughering tens of thousands of innocent Iraqis MIGHT be." he told parliament to cheers from members of his ruling Labour Party. "The important thing to remember is that it doesn't matter anymore. It's done. If you were crazy for the love of President Jesus Bush like I was, you'd have done the same!"

He said everyone should now rejoice in that liberation and work together to help the Bush Administration destroy Iraq and build a future of despair and death for the Iraqi people.

Blair was facing MPs in Britain's House of Commons Tuesday in a debate on last week's Butler report into intelligence failings over Iraq.

Challenged by former Cabinet minister Clare Short, who quit her post over the conflict, Blair said confronted with the choice of backing away or making sure he was incapable of developing WMD: "I still think we made the right decision. I don't know why. Perhaps it was my girlish crush on President Jesus Bush leading me to temporary insanity that prevented any kind of reasonable, rational decision but I'm not sure. I've been on heavy sedatives for the last two years and have been treated for severe mental illness, you really shouldn't trust me, but you SHOULD rejoice in the liberation of Iraq!"

Blair said it was "absolutely clear" Saddam had every intention of carrying on developing weapons and procuring materials to do so. It was also "absolutely clear" that God was going to come down and strike us all dead if we didn't remove Saddam from power and "absolutely clear" that the world is a save and happy place and would probably be a pile of smoking ruins if Saddam hadn't been ousted.

However, much to the great suprise of everyone, the Tory leader Michael Howard, master of his own weapons of self-destruction, said he could not see how any MP, knowing as they did now that weapons of mass destruction were not likely to be found, could have backed the government war motion, which had stressed that Iraq had such arms.

Mr Howard accused the prime minister of "serial ignorance" about vital issues.

He accused himself of "grandstanding and lying" and "voting for the war even though I didn't know what I knew then or now would have known had I known what I would have known then..."

He had not known "vital" details about the claim that Iraq could use biological weapons within 45 minutes, intelligence reports being withdrawn last year and claims of abuse by coalition troops.

"The prime minister's credibility is at stake today," said Mr Howard. "My own credibility, of course, has been in the rubbish bin for years..."

He said Mr Blair "hasn't been straight with the British people today" and asked "why does sorry seem to be the hardest word?".

Indeed. So, Mr Blair, here are the lyrics to your love song to President Jesus Bush which have been ringing in your ears like tinnitus for the last 18 months:

Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word

Music by Elton John
Lyrics by Bernie Taupin


What have I got to do to make you love me
What have I got to do to make you care
What do I do when lightning strikes me
And I wake to find that you're not there

What do I do to make you want me
What have I got to do to be heard
What do I say when it's all over
And sorry seems to be the hardest word

It's sad, so sad
It's a sad, sad situation
And it's getting more and more absurd
It's sad, so sad
Why can't we talk it over
Oh it seems to me
That sorry seems to be the hardest word

What do I do to make you love me
What have I got to do to be heard
What do I do when lightning strikes me
What have I got to do
What have I got to do
When sorry seems to be the hardest word


zondag, juli 18, 2004

SPICCOLI AND BUTLER REPORT AGREED: INTELLIGENCE ON IRAQ 'SERIOUSLY FLAWED, DUDE'

British intelligence reports on Saddam Hussein’s weapons of mass destruction in the run up to the Iraq war were “like, totally based on, like, not reality” and “seriously flawed, dude”, the Butler Inquiry informed today, in utter agreement with an earlier report released by former Ridgemont High student Jeff Spiccoli.

Spiccoli, who earlier summed upon the premise of America's Declaration of Independence thusly: "So this Jefferson dude was like, 'Look, the reason we left this England place is 'cause it was so bogus. So if we don't get some primo rules ourselves--pronto--then we're just gonna be bogus, too.", was extensively quoted in the Butler Inquiry.

The inquiry said that when the British government began considering military action against Iraq in March 2002, the intelligence was “like, totally missing” to justify claims that Iraq was in breach of United Nations resolutions requiring it to disarm.

And it said that since the conflict, key claims based on reports from agents in Iraq including claims that the Iraqis had recently produced biological agents, were "similar to LSD-induced hallucinations minus the spiders".

The report also criticised the government’s controversial dossier on Iraqi weapons, published in the run up to war, saying that it was a little too gnarly to be credible" and "the lesson of the build up to Iraq is that people on 'ludes should not drive."

It said that Tony Blair’s statement in the British House of Commons "reinforced the impression that he is a presumptuous, arrogant and infatigable little liar who will say anything at all to maintain his exalted position as President Bush's favourite little poodle, dude."

The inquiry acknowledged that quoting Jeff Spiccoli so extensively in its report would probably tip off the source of the subtitle of the report which compared the leap to war by use of bogus intelligence on Iraq's weapons of mass destruction with the legendary Spiccoli confession that "All I need is a cool buzz and some tasty waves and I'm fine."

The report was highly critical of intelligence-gathering in Iraq but in the end, decided what's done is done and there isn't any use crying over spillt milk.

“This is US History, I see the globe right there..." it said.

*****

Tory Leader Says "If Only I Had Thought I'd Known Then What I Think I Thought I Knew Now"

Tory Party Leader Michael Howard has said that he would not have backed the Government in the crucial Commons vote on the Iraq war if he had thought he'd known what he didn't know or had known about what he would have thought if he'd have known that the intelligence was flawed.

In an interview with the Sunday Times, Mr Howard said;

"If I knew then what I know now, I'd know more than I knew then and then I would have known that I shouldn't have known about voting for that resolution, I think." he said. "Unless, of course, somebody or something changes my mind again" he quickly added.

"It is difficult for someone, knowing everything we know now, to have voted for that particular resolution. But if we hadn't known everything we know now, well then, that would have changed everything of course, probably. And even if I had known that what I knew wasn't right, I'd have been wrong for not knowing what I didn't know and voting anyway."

vrijdag, juli 16, 2004

FUNNY V. FUNNY 
  
I'm sure you're familiar with it:  there's funny and then there's FUNNY   You decide for yourself.   There's this, for example:   

Edwards Tells Bush To Act Like Blair Did:  
 
"Democratic vice presidential candidate John Edwards assailed U.S. President George W. Bush for lacking the courage of British Prime Minister Tony Blair, who took full responsibility for the intelligence failures that led both nations into war in Iraq. "
 
And then there's this:  
 
Bush Eats Babies  
 
You just never know where the page is gonna turn.  
 
Good News
 
Stratford Upon Avon- The Truth, which once was no more, has now morphed.  You can find more Stratford flotsam bobbing around Shakespeare Wuz 'Ere
 
And The Word
 
Link often, and link hard.  
 
Lastly, the name of the band I haven't yet formed has still not been taken, if you judge by Google searches, so, it remains the name of the band I haven't yet formed:    
 
Honey, I Killed The President
 
Coming soon to a music scene near you. 
  
 




dinsdag, juli 13, 2004

THE YOUNG BRITISH SOLDIER
Rudyard Kipling

When the 'arf-made recruity goes out to the East
'E acts like a babe an' 'e drinks like a beast,
An' 'e wonders because 'e is frequent deceased
Ere 'e's fit for to serve as a soldier.
Serve, serve, serve as a soldier,
Serve, serve, serve as a soldier,
Serve, serve, serve as a soldier,
So-oldier ~OF~ the Queen!

Now all you recruities what's drafted to-day,
You shut up your rag-box an' 'ark to my lay,
An' I'll sing you a soldier as far as I may:
A soldier what's fit for a soldier.
Fit, fit, fit for a soldier . . .

First mind you steer clear o' the grog-sellers' huts,
For they sell you Fixed Bay'nets that rots out your guts --
Ay, drink that 'ud eat the live steel from your butts --
An' it's bad for the young British soldier.
Bad, bad, bad for the soldier . . .

When the cholera comes -- as it will past a doubt --
Keep out of the wet and don't go on the shout,
For the sickness gets in as the liquor dies out,
An' it crumples the young British soldier.
Crum-, crum-, crumples the soldier . . .

But the worst o' your foes is the sun over'ead:
You ~must~ wear your 'elmet for all that is said:
If 'e finds you uncovered 'e'll knock you down dead,
An' you'll die like a fool of a soldier.
Fool, fool, fool of a soldier . . .

If you're cast for fatigue by a sergeant unkind,
Don't grouse like a woman nor crack on nor blind;
Be handy and civil, and then you will find
That it's beer for the young British soldier.
Beer, beer, beer for the soldier . . .

Now, if you must marry, take care she is old --
A troop-sergeant's widow's the nicest I'm told,
For beauty won't help if your rations is cold,
Nor love ain't enough for a soldier.
'Nough, 'nough, 'nough for a soldier . . .

If the wife should go wrong with a comrade, be loath
To shoot when you catch 'em -- you'll swing, on my oath! --
Make 'im take 'er and keep 'er: that's Hell for them both,
An' you're shut o' the curse of a soldier.
Curse, curse, curse of a soldier . . .

When first under fire an' you're wishful to duck,
Don't look nor take 'eed at the man that is struck,
Be thankful you're livin', and trust to your luck
And march to your front like a soldier.
Front, front, front like a soldier . . .

When 'arf of your bullets fly wide in the ditch,
Don't call your Martini a cross-eyed old bitch;
She's human as you are -- you treat her as sich,
An' she'll fight for the young British soldier.
Fight, fight, fight for the soldier . . .

When shakin' their bustles like ladies so fine,
The guns o' the enemy wheel into line,
Shoot low at the limbers an' don't mind the shine,
For noise never startles the soldier.
Start-, start-, startles the soldier . . .

If your officer's dead and the sergeants look white,
Remember it's ruin to run from a fight:
So take open order, lie down, and sit tight,
And wait for supports like a soldier.
Wait, wait, wait like a soldier . . .

When you're wounded and left on Afghanistan's plains,
And the women come out to cut up what remains,
Jest roll to your rifle and blow out your brains
An' go to your Gawd like a soldier.
Go, go, go like a soldier,
Go, go, go like a soldier,
Go, go, go like a soldier,
So-oldier ~of~ the Queen!

*****

As a matter of general principle, I believe there can be no doubt that criticism in time of war is essential to the maintenance of any kind of democratic government ... Too many people desire to suppress criticism simply because they think it will give some comfort to the enemy ... If that comfort makes the enemy feel better for a few moments, they are welcome to it as far as I am concerned, because the maintenance of the right of criticism in the long run will do the country maintaining it a great deal more good than it will do the enemy, and it will prevent mistakes which might otherwise occur.

Sen. Robert Taft, R-Ohio (a.k.a. "Mr. Republican")
Quoted in The War on Our Freedoms
December 1941



zondag, juli 11, 2004

Kerry/Edwards Gaining Too Quickly, Officials discuss how to delay Election Day

WASHINGTON -- With great panic streaking the corridors of the White House since it was revealed that John Kerry got a 5-point life in the hourly Newsweek Poll after picking John Edwards, U.S. officials immediately responded that they have discussed the idea of postponing Election Day in the event of a terrorist attack on or about that day, or, in the event it appears the Bush/Cheney ticket might not win, even if it cheats.

A Homeland Security Department spokesman said yesterday that "if we do not appear to be likely to win the election, there is a very good chance that a coincidental terrorist attack would occur in the United States causing the need for immediate postponement and/or cancellation of the Presidential Elections."

The department has referred questions about the matter to the Department of Justice's Office of Legal Counsel, spokesman Brian Roehrkasse said.

DeForest B. Soaries Jr., chairman of the newly created U.S. Election Assistance Commission who was appointed by President Bush, requested authority to postpone indefinately or cancel altogether, the Presidential Elections in November should it appear that the Kerry/Edwards ticket has a possibility of winning.

"Naturally, some sort of "terrorist" attack would likely take place in that event because as we all know, terrorists love President Bush and do not want to see him toppled from power. If there is the combination of a Kerry/Edwards victory and a terrorist attack, even if it is somewhere else in the world, we will move immediately to cancel the elections and send everyone home where they belong." Soaries said.

President Bush, dining on human skulls with Vice President Dick Cheney, cited Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge's recent warning of such an attack in a news conference last week, saying it was based on intercepted "chatter" among al Qaeda operatives.

"Terrorists, Saddam, Evil, Evil," Bush recited between bites.

What has Homeland Security officials worried is that Americans might decide at the time of the election that they no longer want Bush and Cheney teaming up to destroy the country and would be willing to let Kerry and Edwards have a chance to muck it up even further.

"We have to be prepared because Americans who vote for Kerry on Election Day are probably terrorists attempting to disrupt the election." Dick Cheney added as blood dripped from his chin. "And if you don't believe me, well, just go fuck yourself." he smiled. "Election Day is ours, baby."

vrijdag, juli 09, 2004

Report slams John Edwards for Iraq intelligence failures




WASHINGTON -- In a highly critical report issued Friday, the U.S. Senate Intelligence Committee found that John Edwards was almost solely responsible for prewar estimates of Iraq's weapons of mass destruction being overstated and unsupported by intelligence because he was too inexperienced as a politician and because he's a "trial lawyer".

Committee Chairman Pat Roberts, R-Kansas, told reporters that intelligence used to support the invasion of Iraq was based on assessments given by John Edwards that were "unreasonable and largely unsupported by the available intelligence."

The committee's conclusions are contained in a 511-page report released Friday and every page is a fierce excoriation of John Edwards and how he caused all America's problems. They further concluded that we should expect nothing better from "dangerous scum like trial lawyers" and "inexperienced Vice Presidential candidates".

"Before the war, the John Edwards told the president as well as the Congress and the public that Saddam Hussein had stockpiles of chemical and biological weapons and if left unchecked would probably have a nuclear weapon during this decade," Roberts said.

"Today we know these assessments were wrong."

Sen. Jay Rockefeller, the leading Democrat on the 18-member panel, said that "bad information" from John Edwards was used to bolster the case for war and that if John Edwards had been Vice President, "there's no telling what kind of chaos would have been wraught."

"We in Congress would not have authorized that war with 75 votes if we knew what we know now," the West Virginia Democrat said. "It's all John Edwards' fault."

"Leading up to September 11, John Edwards didn't connect the dots. What did he ever have to say about The War on Terrorism before 9/11, huh? In Iraq, we are even more culpable because the dots themselves never existed and this too, is John Edwards' fault."

He also said John Edwards failed to "accurately or adequately explain the uncertainties behind the judgments in the October 2002 National Intelligence Estimate to policymakers."

Rockefeller said that "John Edwards" will haunt America's national security "for generations to come."

"Our credibility is diminished. Our standing in the world has never been lower," he said. "We have fostered a deep hatred of Americans in the Muslim world, and that will grow. As a direct consequence, our nation is more vulnerable today than ever before. Oh, woe is us if John Edwards becomes Vice President"

OH PLEASE, DADDY CHENEY PLEASE SAVE US FROM CERTAIN DEATH AND DESTRUCTION BY KEEPING JOHN EDWARDS OUT OF YOUR JOB!


zondag, juli 04, 2004

Fourth of July



So it is, happy Independence Day, Americans.

The Cato Institute weighs in on supporting the principles of Independence Day:

"In these and countless other ways, in the name of helping us, government throws us all in a common pot and decides for us. We "pursue happiness" not as individuals but collectively -- through government. We've turned Jefferson's order on its head. Is it any wonder that so many of us are "unhappy" with the programs we get, with the choices government makes for us? Imagine if government chose our national religious program. When government chooses everything, individuals choose nothing. Look at North Korea for the extreme example of that."

*****

"It is certainly rather a curious thing, that after more than eighty years of national existence, we should have hit upon no better way of celebrating the birth-day of our nation than by a clumsy imitation of the old Roman saturnalia," a New York Times editorial complained in 1859. "By one of the most whimsical freaks imaginable," griped the editors, "the burning of powder has become the one significant ceremony of the national patriotism in keeping its highest Saint's day." --from The Patriot Act the Right's op-ed piece by Jonah Goldberg, editor at large of National Review Online

*****

"If you are one of those who love what President Bush has done for this country and believe you must blindly follow the president to deserve to fly the flag, you should ask yourself some difficult questions about just how proud you are of the America we now inhabit:

Are you proud that one in six children lives in poverty in America?

Are you proud that 40 million adult Americans are functional illiterates?

Are you proud that the bulk of the jobs being created these days are low- and minimum-wage jobs?

Are you proud of asking your fellow Americans to live on $5.15 an hour?

Are you proud that, according to a National Geographic Society survey, 85% of young adult Americans cannot find Iraq on the map (and 11% cannot find the United States!)?

Are you proud that the rest of the world, which poured out its heart to us after Sept. 11, now looks at us with disdain and disgust?

Are you proud that nearly 3 billion people on this planet do not have access to clean drinking water when we have the resources and technology to remedy this immediately?

Are you proud of the fact that our president sent our soldiers off to a war that had nothing to do with the self-defense of this country?"


-- The Patriot Act, the Left's op-ed piece by Michael Moore.

*****

Meanwhile, back in Gotham City, Some 36,000 fireworks will burst in the New York sky tonight to celebrate the nation's independence

In addition, a 20-ton chunk of granite from the Adirondack Mountains in upstate New York will be placed inside the 70-foot deep foundation of what used to be the WTC, launching a five-year construction plan for a 1,776-foot skyscraper that will become an iconic symbol for the New York City skyline, The Freedom Tower, or, what might later be known as the world's largest terrorist target.

*****

Wondering how Saddam will be celebrating? Perhaps with a game of Rock, Paper, Saddam

*****

4th Of July
Chris Cornell, Soundgarden

Shower in the dark day
Clean sparks diving down
Cool in the waterway
Where the baptized drown
Naked in the cold sun
Breathing life like fire
Thought I was the only one
But that was just a lie

Cause I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July

Pale in the flare light
The scared light cracks & disappears
And leads the scorched ones here
And everywhere no one cares
The fire is spreading
And no one wants to speak about it
Down in the hole
Jesus tries to crack a smile
Beneath another shovel load

And I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July

Now I'm in control
Now I'm in the fall out
Once asleep but now I stand
And I still remember
Your sweet everything
Light a Roman candle
And hold it in your hand

Cause I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July

Music: Cornell; Lyrics: Cornell

*****

And perhaps most importantly of all on this 4th of July, Todos por Portugal! as we await kickoff this evening of the Portugal-Greece final of the Euro 2004.

zaterdag, juli 03, 2004

Go Fuck Yourself!

Desultory Turgescence, fresh from the absinthe and pilsner killing fields of Zizkov, is admittedly a little late coming to this turgid slice of Republican expressiveness, but just the other day, it appears the Vice President of the United States, the man a mere heartbeat from the Presidency, told Vermont Senator Patrick Leahy, "go fuck yourself", after the vice president complained he didn't like the Vermont Democrat attacking Halliburton. The Pentagon says Halliburton, formerly headed by Cheney, overcharged taxpayers $186 million in Iraq, and Leahy calls it war profiteering.

Better still, he was almost self-congratulatory in his defence of himself, telling Mr Cavuto on the Al Jazeera of America, Fox News, "I think that a lot of my colleagues felt that what I had said badly needed to be said, that it was long overdue."

It is, in the opinions of many, the precise expression the Bush Administration has lovingly doled out to its opponents internationally at home, time and time again. If you don't like it, Go Fuck Yourself.

"Go Fuck Yourself" should become the Republican Party's Presidential Campaign Slogan. In fact, it should be everyone's official slogan.

So sing along with the editors of Desultory Turgescence in celebration of the greatest of the ruling party of America: (to the tune of "Here Comes the Bride")

Go Fuck Yourself,
Go Fuck Yourself.
Go Fuck Yourself,
you terrorist-loving surrender monkey.

(well, you get the picture)...