Speaking of drinking, why not a Guide to best New Orleans bars for Mardi Gras?
From the Cocaine?! I Thought I Was Smuggling Diamonds!, Department of Dumb Excuses:
"The problem is the boss paid for me to be transferred and now I am in his debt," he says. "If he puts a gun in my hand and tells me to shoot someone I will have to do it. If he says I have to let him sleep with Laura, there will be nothing I can do.”
It is quite a little tale about a British guy with a dodgy history taking his kids and ex-missus on a trip to Venezuela alleged just to smuggle diamonds but as it turned out, they ended up busted for attempting to smuggle cocaine.
I do feel a little sorry for the woman who may very well have been duped but when you think about it, what was she doing running off with her ex and her kids to Venezuela when she had a boyfriend already? Lure of the sunshine thousands of miles away too strong?
Perhaps should feel good for the kids, getting out of the clutches of such colossal idiots which no cannot but have a harmful effect on their upbringing.
But really, the guy? Are we really supposed to feel sorry for him? Jackal.
And yes, today IS Pancake Day in England, aka Shrove Tuesday, the day before the onset of Lent. For those of you who don't know any better yet still somehow manage to care, read this for a little background.
Just realise that whilst people in Ingerland are stuffing their gobs with pancakes, in New Orleans they're having "real" fun getting all liquored up at Mardi Gras.
Anyway, in theory, today is the day you are supposed to confess all your terrible sins and seek absolution for them.
So start confessin', kids.
And whilst it's no pancake, how about a Dashimaki fried egg, Japanese-style, like?