maandag, januari 26, 2004

Holy Hot Potatoes, Batman, Blair is in a Pickle!

Well, its neigh upon high noon for Prime Minister Tony Blair. First up for the chopping block is the tuition top-up fees issue which Blair, in typically idiotic fashion, has made a make-or-break issue for his premiership. It isn't bad enough he has to support Bush to the hilt, he makes matters worse by trying to swagger like him as well. Instead of negotiation, Mr "I have no reverse" has used a tactic of the Jesus Bush crowd, bullying hyperbole supported by...wait a minute, the British aren't a nation of moronic somnambulists, this isn't America! There is no support! Not sure how "absolutely ruling out compromise" on such a volatile issue is democracy in action but, well, Tony Blair has been setting himself up to play the martyr for quite awhile now and its beginning to look like he's used up the last of his good credit.

Well, at the very least, it's a nail biter which has been more profound by Blair's mistaken identity: he puts on the face of a bulldog yet we've all see his true character as President Jesus Bush's little pet poodle who will perform little dances for the crowd of bloodthirsty neocons when commanded.

Then there's the little matter of an Invasion of Iraq where Blair once again faces a disadvantage President Jesus Bush hasn't had to consider: the British public are actually literate! The British public actually hold their leaders accountable for lies that sent their sons to unnecessary deaths! Of course, the pikers that populate and vote for the unaccountable stupidity of the Jesus Bush Administration have no such recourse. They love Jesus and don't forget 9/11! That excuses all!

In any case, Mr Blair's got a little business about those


they don't seem to have existed, to contend with. Making matters worse, as the Independent noted today, the insistence of Mr "I have no Reverse!" that the intelligence on Saddam Hussein?s weapons of mass destruction was right is beginning to look detached from reality.

Making his moronic position even harder to defend was United States Secretary of State Colin Powell's admission, in the wake of the resignation of the head of the WMD-hunting Iraq Survey Group, that he did not know whether illicit weapons would be found in Iraq.

Now, let me reitterate, if Tony Blair were the President of the United States, he could be like Jesus Bush, making billions for his oil cronies, pissing on his allies, smirking like a self-righteous little idiot and fucking his entire country down the toilet for the sake of his own stupidity. Sadly for Mr Blair, he lives in a different world that isn't filled with uneducated zombies and he will be held accountable for the lies he told eventually.

As for Bush, who knows? Maybe someday his limp corpse will be hanging from a lamp post on Pennsylvania Avenue alongside people like Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld and all the other sanctimonious arseholes who brought you the smug yet suicidally stupid invasion of Iraq. Maybe he'll escape free and win his reelection. Certainly there are enough Jesus zombies in America to validate such stupidity. But Blair's not got that luxery. His clock has almost expired.


Sure to overwhelm the Jesus Bush Super Action Figure Doll, riding on the heels of his "I have a Scream" speech, Democrat and Doctor, Howard Dean now has a Mean Dean action figure to hawk.

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