zondag, maart 07, 2004

Clash of the Titans

"...So you have one party, the Republican Party, the so-called party of the heartland, which won't nominate a guy unless he has a ranch the size of Oklahoma. Republicans don't think you're fit to govern unless you're on the north 40 every summer clearing brush. And then you have the Democrats, the so-called party of the people, who won't nominate a guy unless his family had an upper-deck berth on the Mayflower.

This year's nominee, John Kerry, is almost a parody of the East Coast establishment. He's descended from John Winthrop, the first governor of the Massachusetts Bay Colony, and his mother is a member of the famously haughty Forbes clan. He spent part of his childhood at a boarding school in Switzerland before his aunt, whose estate included a bowling alley inside the barn, sent him to then-snooty St. Paul's..."

Whose Side is God On?
"If our life lacks a constant magic
it is because we choose to
observe our acts & lose ourselves
in consideration of their imagined
form instead of being impelled by
their force."

Antonin Artaud

The two remaining Democratic presidential candidates, with Al Sharpton and Dennis Kucinich along for comic relief, showed up for a debate in New York yesterday morning, and the most revealing moment came toward the end, when the New York Times' Elisabeth Bumiller posed a question to John Kerry:

Bumiller: "President Bush has said that freedom and fear have always been at war, and God is not neutral between them. He's made quite clear in his speeches that he feels God is on America's side. Really quick, is God on America's side?"

Kerry: "Well, God will--look, I think--I believe in God, but I don't believe, the way President Bush does, in invoking it all the time in that way. I think it is--we pray that God is on our side, and we pray hard. And God has been on our side through most of our existence."

The answer, of course, is that God and Jesus are both on the side of President Jesus Bush because he invokes them so much in his great speeches justifying the killing of other human beings. As far as President Jesus Bush, Jesus himself and God are concerned, there will never be enough killing in their names to suit their purposes.

So, the answer to the headline, whose side is God on, is why, whomever is willing to kill them most people in his name, of course!

That's the sermon for Sunday, folks. Go out there and kill in the name of God and Jesus and Democracy!


Springsteen Used For Torture

"First I spent a month in a cell 2 metres by 2 metres that had a roof of sheet iron, with unbearable heat," the Spaniard, Hamed Abderrahman Ahmad reportedly told the Cadena Ser radio network upon his release after a two year stay in America's favourite prison at Guantanamo Bay.

"All day they blared patriotic American music. It was Born in the USA by Bruce Springsteen. I remember we had to put wet towels on our heads to be able to bear the heat and not hear the music . . . Later they put us in even smaller cells."

I have to admit, Born in the USA is a pretty obnoxious song but this proves, YET AGAIN, that the Jesus Monkey Brigade simply doesn't know what it's doing.

First of all, unbeknownst to most of the single-brain cell Patriots who love to chant it with patriotic gusto, Born in the USA is hardly a paen to American interventionism. It is about idiots who got stuck killing in Vietnam and unlike the current Murder Inc. Administration, this particular idiot didn't seem to particularly relish it.

"Got in a little hometown jam

So they put a rifle in my hand
Sent me off to a foreign land
To go and kill the yellow man"

Were the parrots of the Administration not such automotons and were the jailors at Guantanamo a little more intelligent, they might have realised that if they'd really wanted to torture these "terrorists", they would have blared Celine Dion croaking away at "That's The Way It Is" or any maybe just a looped tape of Celine warbling over breakfast, lunch, dinner and prayer. In fact, to make the torture even worse, they could have played Celine Dion songs virtually nonstop only to be interrupted by interviews with Celine Dion and that inhuman accent of hers twittering away about what a find her fat, bald husband is.

If the prisoners ever got immune to Celine over time, they could introduce intervals of oh, let's say The Maria Carey Christmas Album. I imagine all the prisoners at Gitmo would have committed suicide within a month or would have divulged every al Qaeda secret known just to get the music to stop. Idiots run this war, I tell you.


Come to Sweden, Where the Homeless Have Sex in the Streets!

A homeless couple protesting a lack of housing in Stockholm placed a bed in the middle of a downtown square and had sex in front of numerous spectators, police said today...but WHERE is the video???


Responding to the criticism that his poetry lacks
meter, H. G. Wells declares:

"Meters are used for gas,
not the outpourings
of the human heart."


So much for the human heart.

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